Helpful Paranoia

Remember my "almost-deadly mistake" of last week?  Today I did my first neuter since then, on a dog about the same size.  Last week's case was running through my mind the whole time, and I was extra careful.  I watched my suture placement more closely than I have since I first started doing this surgery, despite the fact that I've done thousands of these procedures.  This is something that I'll probably do quite a bit in the future, not being as comfortable and complacent as I have in the past.

Honestly, this isn't necessarilly a bad thing.  I realize that I'm only human and mistakes will happen (not just as a vet but in my life in general).  However, I hope that I learn from my mistakes and never make the same one twice.  I can clearly remember each slipped stitch, wrong drug dosage, and missed diagnosis I've made, as well as I remember certain of the highly successful cases.  Everyone will make a mistake once.  I try hard never to make the same mistake twice.  Part of experience is learning from your past screw-ups and preventing them from happening again in the future.  There are many things I am confident that I will never do a second time because I felt so bad or stupid the first time. 

A little paranoid to triple-check this surgery? Probably.  But I consider this a helpful kind of paranoia, as it makes me a better doctor.  Sometimes the hardest lessons are the ones we learn the most from.